I put up with it because I know you like it, but it doesn't do anything for me." Ahhh, well maybe that's it. It calms me. I'm still stressed. Can I squeeze them some more?"She gave him a playful sneer, effectively communicating her response. "Well, at least your groping feels better than what's coming in a few weeks."Steven immediately looked interested. "What's that?" My annual mammogram." You've never really said much about them before. Is it awkward to show your breasts to a physician?"She considered her answer. "Well, yes, it is, and it seems like doctor's offices are always cold." She regretted giving him the mental picture he was now surely forming... Wife, half-naked, hard nipples, distinguished doctor fondling her breasts. It was time to turn him away that particular thought."I've done it often enough. I suppose I'm used to it, but what the test involves..."Steven interjected, "Ah, great! So you don't mind when others see your breasts. Topless beach, here we come!" No, we. .. Forgive me. "You dream about a young woman withAuburn hair. You see her standing in sunlit meadows, or lying on thecarpet of moss growing on rocks by streams. She is painfully real to you.Look at me, Leonard. Look very closely."My eyes MUST have been welling up. They must have. This hurt so much. Ifelt like such a monster.He huffed a breath, broke eye contact, stepped as if to move away,stopped, stepped again, in confusion. I called him by name, without himintroducing himself himself. I knew his secret. He turned to move away.Oh, Len... God... I'm so sorry I had to do this. I continued."When you lie in bed at night, touching yourself, you imagine that you arethat auburn-haired woman. You don't know why, and it fills you with suchhorrible self-loathing. Am I about right?" I don't want to hear this!" he said in a low rumble. It was a measured,controlled rage."You have to," I said sadly. "That's why you're here. A few years ago, foran English assignment, you wrote a paper on.
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